Stars That Won’t STFU

If it were a person, she would have shot it right between the eyes, and giggled the entire walk home. 

She couldn’t bear to be in silence, especially at night. 

Her roommate never understood why the girl couldn’t fall asleep without her headphones in and the 

television on. 

She had asked once, how can you sleep hearing Michael Myers kill all those people?

Estela shrugged and said that it was just her thing. 

And it was, but not by choice. 

If there wasn’t any background noise when it got dark out, she would start to hear them. 

They would keep her up all night. 

Come to work with me for a day and I promise you’ll sleep like a baby, her father offered years ago. 

Everyone else loved to hear them and looked forward to it every night. 

Cozy, warm words that would tuck you in and guide you off to dreamland. 

Not Estela though. 

Her mother wished she could help her child, she felt so bad for her.

Still: bills needed to get paid, meals cooked, clothes folded, toes polished, life went on. 

Noise. Any type was fine. This is how she learned to stop the voices. 

Headphones. Television. Bathroom Fan. Radio. Laptop. Distraction.

It worked for a few years, until the night it didn’t. 

A ford mustang had wrapped itself around a telephone poll which caused the power to go out. 

The chuckles from the stars had interrupted her dream. 

She was confused. Why are the lights out? Why is the tv off? why is it pitch black outside? 

When her roommate told her what happened, she immediately checked the battery on her phone. 

46 %. god damnit! 

In a hurry she opened her iTunes and put her headphones in. 

She thought she could try to rush herself back to sleep before her battery died. 

It was impossible for her to relax though, her heart beats increasing with her anxiety. 

She thought of everything she could to try and help her fall back asleep: 

being on the beach, sheep hoping over a fence one by one, the crackling of a summer campfire. 

It didn’t work. 

Her phone eventually died. 

How pathetic are you? the first star asked almost instantly. 

Estela ran to her window and looked up. There were hundreds of them out tonight. 

Tiny gold specs shining bright against a pitch-black back drop. She filled with dread. 

Estela ran to her roommate’s room and banged on the door. But it was no use. 

She knew the girl was in there, getting soothed to sleep like everyone else. 

You’re twenty-five and still have a roommate? another star asked, why don’t you have a boyfriend? 

She kept an emergency bottle of Ambien in her dresser for emergencies like this. 

You still haven’t lost any weight? Wasn’t that your new year’s resolution? 

The bottle fumbled in her hands, but she eventually managed to snag a few. 

You are so ugly, the next one called out to her. 

She used the bottle to crush the pills and snorted them, hoping they would work faster that way. 

Everyone is hanging out without you, the next one laughed at her, God you’re pathetic.

She jumped back into bed, as if hiding under her blanket was going to stop them. 

As she covered her ears, she started humming to herself as loud as she could. 

She wasn’t sure how much of this she could deal with. 

Another called out to her, this one with pity in its voice, nobody loves you. 

She cried and cried until she passed out. 

Meet the Author:

Mathew VanDenHeuvel is a recent Navy veteran who dropped out of his MBA program one class shy of graduating and moved to Philly to chase his real dream of being a published author. He is currently an MFA candidate at Holy Family University and takes immense pride in the fact that he can put on Not Another Teen Movie, press mute, and recite the entire film.